Getting around Cameroon

Yep, just remember 'no vomiting'. Even if you really want to!

So in Cameroon you are going to end up taking a lot of different types of transport from private cars (a complete luxury) to public busses (a complete nightmare).

OK let's start with the planes and airports. I flew in on Air Maroc and it's fast becoming my favourite airline. The staff are friendly and the flights smooth. However when I landed and got through immigration I was met by a man who claimed to be part of the security team and said that he needed to deal with me specifically as I was from the UK (lucky guess). The guy had no uniform or badge, but pushed himself upon me as I got my bag and said that he was going to show me where to pay airport tax (there isn't airport tax for arrivals). I tried to call the people who were collecting me but my international phone wouldn't get any reception (thanks eKit) and my iPhone had no credit. So this guy calls from his own phone, but I could see him putting in the wrong number. That's when I started freaking a bit. I passed a security guard who checked I had taken the correct bag. I tried to ask him if this guy was his colleague but he ignores me and starts talking to someone else. I get downstairs and the guy then tries to get me to the back of the airport and is really insistent, but I hold on and find the person who was collecting me and we get rid of this guy, who has the gall to ask if I will give him money for something to eat after it becomes apparent that he is not a security guard. This was not a good first impression! 

On the way out of the country I check in my bag and as I am heading to departures I am stopped by someone working for the luggage company. They take me down to the loading bay (I have to leave my passport with a police woman on the way) and they start demanding 2,000 francs for the bag to be wrapped. I explain that I don't have 2,000 francs (why would I, I'm leaving the country) and that no other airport had demanded this. I also point out that they are basically extorting the money out of me, blackmailing me with the threat of not taking my bag. I put my foot down and eventually another member of the team says they'll take it. Thankfully the bag did make it.

All in all I'm very unimpressed with Douala airport. I'd avoid it if you can, it's crawling with charlatans.

So onto public transport. I think I'll start with the taxis. These are OK. Not very safe, but OK. They run on the principle that 5 seats is not an indication of how many people can get into a car, but more of a suggested bare minimum. As such you go to a central pick up point and wait for a car to fill up, which normally means six - eight people and then more people may get picked up on the way. One trip was two hours with ten people (seven adults and three babies) in a normal five door car which was physically painful. The upshot is it's really cheap. 

The busses are cheap too and we took a night bus between Chsang and Beua. This was hideous as we had booked out the back row, but then told that this wasn't possible and instead got two seats between the three or us and not the four seats we had booked. I wrote a rant on my phone about 45mins in. I think it explains everything...

So my trip was again marred by public transport. This time by a night bus between chsang and baua. I had agreed to take the night bus so we could spend some time shopping in Chsang where I hoped to pick up Christmas presents for my family and as we were to have four seats at the back of the night bus, ensuring we had room and could all sleep.

The day did not start out well as we couldn't get a car to Chsang from Menji until after the shops had closed, but by this time the seats on the bus had already been reserved... or so we thought

The Having gotten to the bus station we found out that the person who was booking them had ordered the four seats but hadn't chosen which ones as they had been faced with the apparently monumental task of selecting them by letter. This for some reason meant that we were no longer eligible for our four seats, instead getting two between three of us. At some point after losing feeling in my lower back from sitting on a half seat, I finally got a seat of my own. I use the work seat ironically as it was more of a shelf that collapsed into the gangway of the bus that had no real support and only a half back. The woman next to me was carrying a small boy on her lap, or rather both our laps as he spent most of his time kicking, pushing or resting his head on my legs. The people behind me have also taken to leaning on the seats in front of them and spreading out to lean on me.

Despite being a night bus, the driver seems to think he's in charge of a one man human livestock carnival and is playing oppressively loud music. No one has asked him to turn it down...

Also I found out what it sounds like when three men carry a live pig onto the top of a bus (the one I was in) and lash it to a roof rack like a piece of luggage. FYI it's horrific. I then found out what it's like for a second pig to be strapped onto the first pig. To say this country's view of animal welfare is backward is an extreme understatement.

Oh the child is now trying to grab my necklace. Still only 4+ hours to go. 

So basically I would suggest getting a private car when possible. That is unless you get the chance to bike it. Biking is awkward to begin with, but once you're used to being pushed up against some random guy on the back of a bike, and you get used to leaning forward into said guy when you go up a hill, then it's a lot of fun. You go places that cars can't reach due to the state of the roads and the scenery is amazing. You also get to feel the country rush by and wave to the local children or say hello to the local people who all greet you, well they do in the rainforest adjacent communities an smaller towns. 

Transport is one of the weak areas of Cameroon. It's nice to give it a go and get an insight into life in Cameroon, but long term it would definitely be wearing. This is something the country is working on and the topic of a lot of the radio programmes I heard while in the country. 

I'd say that Cameroon is worth putting up with the poor travel, especially if you're only here for a few weeks. The scenery, food and majority of the people make up for it. Especially if you venture away from the cities and into the communities.