It's a crazy city and after so long in small towns it was just what I wanted. The bustle, the multiculturalism, the plethora of things to do, the bars, the clubs, the food, even the transport system, it all made the Londoner in me feel at home. However, that's not to say it's like London, it really isn't. For one I had never been punched in the face in London, or ever for that matter... How I got punched in the face is a long story, but in short, I got drunk. We'll come onto the details of that story later.
I was in Bangkok for about a week and there is a lot I could tell you, so I'll focus on the big bits.
As I've said many times before in many different Asian places, you have to go see the temples. I went and saw a plethora, but of the big ones, I went to Wat Pho to see the giant reclining Buddha. To say this guy is huge in an understatement, check out the video to see what I mean. The whole complex is beautiful, with huge stupa towering over you, all painstakingly decorated with mosaic patterns.
It was an amazingly hot day and I had already navigated the local train and boat systems plus walked a fair distance, so by the time I was finished with Wat Pho and its extensive grounds I was ready to call it a day, but I pulled through and got to the Grand Palace. This place was packed! Just uncomfortably heaving, with swarms of tourist groups lead by clipboard wielding guides, so when I found out it was 1,000Thb to get in I decided against it. I'm sure it would have been amazing, but as it would have been my fourth or fifth temple that day, I was suffering with monument fatigue. It's worth noting that between the sky train, metro and boats, it's really easy to navigate Bangkok. There are busses too, but I didn't need them.
I also went to the floating market. I was pleased that I had navigated my way to the bus terminal by the victory monument and found the right bus (counter 13). This is so much cheaper than taking a tour, it's only 80THB each way and the minibus is really comfortable. I got to the market a little early, but there was still a lot going on and I ate some really random food. This included an underwater creature that looked like it should have died out with the dinosaurs. I really have no idea what it was, but that's what you get when you point at random stuff and eat it. I think it was a type of crab, at least that's what it tasted like. I also think the salad that it was mixed with included it's eggs as the name of the dish had something to do with eggs... It may have been called the million egg salad, I can't remember. I also ate a local speciality, coconut ice cream served in a coconut shell with the flesh of the coconut on top, all floating in condensed milk... Delicious and deadly I'm sure.
Soi Cowboy is Bangkok's red light district and I was expecting it to mirror Soho, however it was actually quite different. Obviously it's still all about sex, but where Soho has a few peep shows, Soi Cowboy is much more explicit. All of the bars are pretty identical. There are seats around the side of the room which are full of male tourists and a central stage heaving with women in matching bikinis. I mean they can barely move. They then shuffle around not really dancing and then after a while get off the stage to be replaced by a new set in different matching bikinis, which marks them out as being more accomplished in their profession. Each woman has a number on her bikini and you simply go up to the bar, tell them which number you want and she's yours for the'night'. At first it seemed quite odd and a weird cultural experience, but the more I thought about it the sadder it became. There was also a ping pong show half way through, this was also quite sad to see once you thought about the reality of the situation. However I was prepared for this having already seen one on Kho San road.
Koh San road is crazy and I could write an entire blog on the one night I spent there. Jenna and I met up with the Tuttles, Krissy and Brad, a married couple from America who I had met in South Africa. We started off the night with drinks and insects, to be exact scorpions, cockroaches, meal worms, crickets and grubs, plus frogs too. They are actually all really nice and I would eat them again, especially the scorpions which tasted of marmite.
After this we attacked a three litre tower of beer, well the Tuttles and I did. This was the point of no return in retrospect. This lead to brick bar, which we were pleased to find out was full of locals. In fact we were the only four non-Thai people we could see and the music was amazing. People were also really nice and kept giving us shots. This went well with the bottle of whiskey the bar man gave us as a free drink on entry. By now I was making terrible life choices, dancing like a fool and singing along to the Thai music without a) knowing the song and b) bowing Thai! At some point I also went outside bought a new vest and changed into it in the middle of the street... Jenna also wisely made her excuses and went home.
The next stop of course was a ping pong show, this sobered us up a lot. It was just soooo skeezy. We were ushered into the back of a dingy building where a stage and pole was set up. Hesitantly we took our places next to the stage amongst the gawking tourists and ordered drinks. What followed was a parade of rather bored looking women who were dead in the eyes performing various tricks with ping pong balls, cigarettes and goodness knows what else, as we all left. It was just so degrading, it was clear the women weren't enjoying performing and we're going through the motions to make some money.
After that we went to another club for a while before deciding to get a taxi home. As if the night hadn't been interesting enough, the taxi drivers started a fight. I don't know what over, but as I tried to calm it down I was punched in the face. I'm not sure exactly what happened. I remember convincing one of the taxi drivers to walk away which he was. After that there's a blank and the next thing I know I'm standing there wiping blood off my face and looking down to see my top covered in blood. It was mainly coming out of my mouth, but also from a cut on my head. Brad had also been hit in the ear and was bleeding from a cut where it had spoilt. We eventually got back home and Krissy. Who's a pharmacist looked after both our wounds and that was the end of the craziest night in Bangkok.
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